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Posts Tagged ‘family’

  1. The Wise One

    January 30, 2012 by Audrey

    This week I traveled to Houston, TX. What’s in Houston might you ask…

    Houston has been for several weeks now the location of Aloha Base Camp: a room at the Jesse H. Jones Rotary House, only a skybridge away from MD Anderson. If you’re lucky, you’ve never heard of MD Anderson and you have no idea what I’m talking about.

    The University of Texas MD Anderson Cancer Center has ranked #1 in cancer care in the “America’s Best Hospitals” survey published in U.S. News & World Report for eight of the past 10 years, including 2011. When you have been living with stage 4 Metastatic cancer for over 2-years and you just got diagnosed with an additional cancer in your spinal fluid, when you need a shunt in your head to drain fluid down to your belly and an Ommaya reservoir to allow intra-cranial chemotherapy, that’s where you want to be. So that’s where Team Tigger has set up camp, affectionately nicknamed Aloha Base Camp.

    My friend V. has been on a healing mission since she was diagnosed with Lobular Carcinoma breast cancer in the summer of 2009. That mission first took her to Atlanta, GA, where she was treated at the Winship Cancer Institute at Emory University. The goal was to get closer to her friends and family; and that’s where Team Tigger started to form: V.’s husband, her family, her childhood friends. All along, V. has wanted us to trust ”To fear for me is not loving me” she said in her CaringBridge Diary. She always thought, and still thinks, that she will beat that cancer. Both of them.

    On June 16, 2010 V. celebrated her 45th birthday in Atlanta. In February of 2011, she was feeling good enough to move back to Maui, HI. Before this week, the last time I saw V. was in September, in Las Vegas, NV where she had a celebration for life with her 17 closest girl friends. Those women finished putting the T behind Team Tigger and when in December V. had to be rushed to MD Anderson developed an intricate support system that I’m extremely grateful to be a part of.

    So, when I disappeared for a few days last week, that’s where I was, at Aloha Base Camp. It was my turn to take care of our friend. I helped preparing her meals, and was on pill-watch because I’m better at following a schedule than her big Australian Teddy Bear of a husband. I was a sounding board for the rest of the team (husband, dad and stepmom), and a presence and source of entertainment for V.

    Again V. is a miracle. I was expecting to find a sick person, I found a healing person. V.’s favorite joke: “you girls are so crazy that all of you know that I pooped before I even get out of the bathroom”. Yup, that’s how tight the Ocean 17 net is. V.’s laughter is contagious.

    V.’s stepmom nicknamed me “The Wise One” because I tried to direct all my love and energy into appeasing the fears and the anger that we all develop against cancer. I concentrated on trying to bring everyone together into a strong loving bound. I tried to stay objective and at peace. I absorbed. I discovered that 45 minutes can feel like hours when you are witnessing a friend being in pain and you know that there’s a way to relieve her but you can’t and you have to wait. I realized that the family ties are among the strongest and the weakest at the same time. I experienced empathy in its purest, rawest, draining form.

    Everyday I try to respect V.’s request and not to fear. She gave me this necklace that says “Trust” and I’m caring it around my neck. I’m not going to lie, I’m a little afraid of letting go of my fear and simply trust. But for V. I’ll try to take the leap of faith, because I don’t think I’m the Wise One, I think she is.


  2. Christmas cookies

    December 23, 2011 by Audrey

    France. Sweet France. Christmas with the family and my young nephews; 2 and 4 1/2 years old. Of course, as soon as I arrived I was the dedicated baby-sitter… Except that, well, I’m not much of a baby-sitter and I don’t know what to do with 2 little boys. So, going against my mother’s advice, I decided to start a cookies making workshop for M. Bought cookie cutters in all different shapes and food coloring… For the rest, I left it to the Internet and its fabulous collection of recipes.

    I decided on the following: Sugar Cookies from Delish.com and the Ornamental Frosting from TLC. It was not as easy as I thought it would be to find something easy that didn’t involve crazy ingredients (like meringue powder) or that meant another trip to the store and I was not in the mood.

    Day 1: Baking

    I guess it’s when you’re making them yourself that you realize that cookies are pretty much simply and obnoxious amount of butter and sugar…  Playing with the dough was fun and M. enjoyed all the shapes of cookie cutters. We decided to go with a star, a shooting star, a Christmas tree and what we think is an angel. According to my sister one of the shape we didn’t use was actually a Santa… Oh well, guess our imagination was limited on this one…
    It took me a couple of batches to find the right thickness, the right over temperature and mode. At the end of Day 1, we had 3 dozen cookies that were acceptable enough to be decorated. And I was exhausted!

     

    Day 2: Decorating

    It’s a actually a good thing that M. was not here today to play with the food coloring. I discovered something: food coloring COLORS… everything… starting with my fingers. Ok, well, I’m not the best artist when it comes to playing with colors. So I called for help… MOM!!! Thank god, my mother is the painter of the family and she ended-up having fun with it, which was not a guaranteed win when you know how much she dislikes baking. It took us about an hour. I applied the large first layer, and armed with a syringe, she did the extra stuff. It still doesn’t looking anywhere professional but for a first time (for both of us) I think we did ok. My grandmother was really happy (with all the sugar – because yes, frosting is nothing more than more butter and more sugar) that we were going to have homemade cookies and that made my day.

    Now, I’ll have to try some but believe me when I tell you that I’m SERIOUSLY looking forward to get back on the treadmill after the Holidays! If you know any good recipes, whether it’s for the cookies or for a lighter version of frosting (and maybe less grainy too, smoother), please shoot them my way, I might give them a shot for Easter!



  3. Holiday Shopping – Part 2

    December 3, 2011 by Audrey

    Weeks before Christmas: 3
    Gifts purchased & wrapped: 2
    Idea ready to be purchased: 1
    Excuse for not doing a better job so far: 1
    (since I’m going to be in France in December, it would be ridiculous to purchase things here and transport them overseas. Better off purchasing gifts once I get there, right?)

    The brilliant ideas that I can share with you are the following:

    iPhoto offers a really fun tool that allows you to order prints, or put your favorite shots on books, cards & calendars. I went for a more subdued version and simply got a print of one of my favorite shot with the person who the gift is for. I put it in a shabby-chic frame (inspired by Anthropologie, purchased much cheaper on Amazon) et voila! A very personal gift that comes from the heart and will bring back fun memories. Thank you G. for the inspiration.

    My second gift was totally stolen from one of my favorite blogger: Here Comes Gina. She was singing the praises of a series of cute bowls found at WestElm and when I saw the picture, I knew they would be perfect for my friend A.

    Brilliant idea number 3: how to conveniently avoid having to think about gifts for at least a couple years (Christmas and birthday included)? The answer: the TV series on DVD. I got my mom the 1st season of Mad Men for her birthday in May. She liked it a lot. Guess who’s getting Season 2 for Christmas?

    Disclaimer: I have several friends whose name start with the letter A (don’t try to snoop around ladies); and my mom doesn’t read my blog.


  4. On being thankful

    November 23, 2011 by Audrey

    Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. We do not celebrate Thanksgiving in France. I never felt close to that tradition of Family, Food and Frenzy shopping (well, on black Friday that is). For my first few years in the U.S. I bounced around, from family to family, and learned about Thanksgiving traditions.

    It’s never fun for me to crash a family event. My friends have shown a lot of generosity for inviting me over the years, but Thanksgiving really became meaningful to me when, a few years ago, I started celebrating it with my eclectic, wine-drinking, turkey-cooking family of friends.

    That’s when my favorite Thanksgiving tradition started making the most sense: counting our blessings.

    What you need to know is that being French, the whole idea of being thankful about something has been foreign to me for the longest time. We, French people, usually tend to look at the glass half empty and often forget to be thankful for whatever beverage is in there (well, unless it’s really good wine… Then… Maybe.)

    So, here we go… In this tumultuous end of 2011, I still find in my heart to be thankful. I’m thankful for my healthy, loud-yelling, tough-loving family; I’m thankful for my friends and the support they have shown throughout those times of insecurity; I’m thankful for being able to work a 12-hour day without (almost) ever feeling like I’m working; I’m thankful for the best roommate someone can have and all the baked goodies that come with it. Simply, I’m thankful to be alive and I’m thankful to be living.

    Enjoy your turkey tomorrow and all the good things that come with it (not just talking about cranberry sauce here…)


  5. Holiday Shopping – Part 1

    November 13, 2011 by Audrey

    Yes, Holiday Season is supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year… But what’s leading to it resembles more an obstacle race, with great shopping opportunities as a reward.

    I’m a spontaneous “gifter”. I love to get people unexpected presents. I love to see something and think, So&So would love that. And get it. And gift it. It’s the most rewarding feeling because it comes from a genuine place in the heart and it generally hits the spot. Bull-eye style.

    But Holiday gifting is another story. Something that requires planning, list making, budgeting… No room, whatsoever, is left for spontaneity… I don’t like it, but I can deal with that so, along the years, I developed a very strategical approach to the Holiday shopping. And, of course, my plan involves lists making…

    Please do not laugh.

    I created a spreadsheet where I keep track year after year of what I gifted people, as well as the gift value (that’s for the budgeting part). I start pulling out this master list around that time, mid-November, and look at last years gifts. How were they received? What was a hit? What was not? I look at my list and sort through who will I be “working” on getting something to? Who might be a last minute decision?

    Then comes the list making for the upcoming season. A blank slate as of November 13th… A list of names with empty cells in front of them, empty cells waiting to be filled with ideas and final purchases, recorded as a source of information for the upcoming years.

    This year my A-List is short. Mostly family members and very close friends. I’m counting 9 gifts to purchase. Total allowed budget: $300.00. Now, it’s time to look for inspiration: blogs, magazines, conversations… and start filling those blank cells with ideas and price tags. I call it shopping in spirit…

    This year is going to be different from the past few ones since I’m actually going to spend the Holidays in France, with my family. No shipping constraints for once. Maybe a little more room for being creative. However, not spending much time with people doesn’t help finding that perfect gift. No eavesdropping on a conversation and picking-up that my mother really likes this silk scarf she saw in a magazine… You have to go blind; and hope for the best.

    What are your tricks for good Holiday shopping? Are you a planner or a last-minuter? Do you set a budget or just go with the flow and just hope for the best?


  6. Five Grandmother Rules

    October 20, 2011 by Audrey

    My grandmother is a very important part in my life. She and my grandfather took care of me until I turned 5 or so, while my parents worked; and we developed a bond that can never be broken. After I finished college and moved to Lyon, I lived with them for a few years until I found a steady job and my sister and I took an apartment together.

    My grandmother has rules. Many rules. I often told her: “You should write a book with all your rules”. I didn’t always like those rules. But now that I’m far away, I realize that my grandmother’s rules are ingrained in me and I cherish them.

    Here’s a top 5 of my favorite grandmother’s rules:

    Always put the new food in the back of your fridge

    If you want to avoid wasting food, eat the older stuff first. And it’s easier to pick up the food that’s in the front. Common sense meets house-keeping 101, my grandma is good at that.

    Iron everything (or almost)

    This one drives my roommate to tears (of laughing, of course), but yes, at my grandmother’s we iron the towels and the bed sheets; they take less closet space when they’re ironed flat. We get a pass on underwear, we not THAT crazy. But we fold neatly the plastic bags from the grocery store. The first time she saw me doing that, K. looked at me like I had three heads.

    Start your day with making your bed

    You’d think, it’s a way to start clean and another good house-keeping rule (along the line of “Do not leave for vacation with a messy house – you’ll be happy to come back to a clean place when you return”), but, sometimes, I have a sneaky feeling that it’s more about you never know who will walk in your bedroom… ahem… Grandma, really?

    Hair is a woman’s most important jewel

    No pixie cut in grandmother’s land. A beautiful, well groomed, shiny hair makes any woman look beautiful.

    And my all-time favorite…

    Always wear clean underwear

    Oh it’s not a health thing or anything… Her reasoning behind it: if you get hit by a bus or die suddenly, you don’t want people to find you with dirty underwear!

    Gotta love my grandma!

    Just tell me I’m not the only one who was brain-washed by 1950ies housekeeping rules; and please tell me I’m not the only one who catches myself following them to the T… What are your grandmothers’ rules?